


Son or Dog?

by SucculentHyena



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Humor, M/M, Mystery, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:46:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26222863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SucculentHyena/pseuds/SucculentHyena
Summary: Nobody can stop talking about Steve Rogers, the newest employee in the office. He’s nice, he’s handsome, and he adores Charlie.There’s only one thing they can’t figure out: is Charlie his son? Or his dog?Bucky’s going to try his best to find out.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Comments: 42
Kudos: 196
Collections: Stucky Bingo 2020





	Son or Dog?

**Author's Note:**

> My fill for the Stucky Bingo 2020, for the square “Single Parent AU”… or is it? ;)

> >I resolved the submission issue

Bucky read the message from IT, relieved that they’d gotten back to him so fast.

> >Great! So I can submit my project and it will work?
> 
> >No, I resolved the misalignment so you can no longer submit directly into NetSuite

Bucky blinked. What?

> >How am I supposed to submit my project if I can’t submit to NetSuite?
> 
> >You’re supposed to submit projects through Precourse. Once it gets approved it’ll automatically transfer to NetSuite
> 
> >But why can’t I just submit to NetSuite if that worked before?
> 
> >You shouldn’t have been able to submit directly. Submit through Precourse and it’ll work
> 
> >Okay, thanks!

Bucky thumped his head on his desk and groaned. Why did they have so many project softwares! Couldn’t one just do the job?

“ _Psst!_ Bucky!” Clint hissed from above the cubicle wall between them.

“What?” Bucky groaned, his face still planted on his desk.

“Steve just put a picture frame on his desk!”

That got Bucky looking up, his IT troubles forgotten. “What?! What’s the picture of?”

“That’s the thing,” Clint said excitedly, “nobody knows! Look!” he pointed.

Bucky rolled his chair back and leaned out of his cubicle, peeking around the side to see Steve’s desk at the end of the row where the poor guy had been assigned with no walls. His only privacy was that his desk faced outward, leaving the wall to his back where nobody could see what was on his monitor- or the new picture at his desk.

“Has he said anything about it? It’s gotta be a picture of Charlie, right?”

“Not a word. Everyone’s trying to get a look, but he won’t leave his desk” Clint grinned, then motioned to the general room.

Bucky looked over and saw, like him and Clint, everyone else was peeking over their cubicles at Steve’s desk. Luckily, Steve was too busy at his computer to look up and see that practically the whole floor was watching him.

Steve had only been working at the company for barely a month, but he’d quickly become the focal point of workplace gossip. He was polite, kind, and far too endearing. It also didn’t hurt that he was drop-dead gorgeous.

One could easily guess he was fit underneath his dress shirt and slacks, but thanks to Darcy spilling her tea- and really, _thank you Darcy_ \- all over his white shirt the one day, they’d all gotten an eyeful of his toned pecs and six-pack that had previously been hidden under the stiff material. Over half the office, Bucky included, had _gawked_.

Steve’s swimsuit model body aside, what really drew everyone to him was the mystery of _Charlie_.

Lovingly named _Son or Dog?_ , it was the height of their break room conversations. It was half-gossip and half-game, with an actual betting pool that kept building every day.

It had started innocuously enough when Steve told the story of how he’d taken Charlie to the park, only for him to immediately run into a huge puddle of mud and roll around. The ensuing walk home and bath fiasco had gotten a laugh out of everyone, and then Steve waved goodbye as his break finished.

“Man, that sounds like a really cute kid” Sam had said.

“Dude, that was clearly a dog” Clint corrected.

Sam raised his brow, “Did you not hear the guy? He said his kid hates baths, he had to bribe him with cookies to get him in the tub”

“Okay, first, he said _Charlie_ hates baths, he never said kid, and second, those cookies were peanut butter biscuits, which I feed Lucky on the regular”

“Dude was clearly talking about his kid”

“He couldn’t have made it any more obvious he was talking about a dog- guys, back me up here” Clint said, turning the question out to the rest of the room.

What followed was a lengthy debate of the words Steve had used and all the ways they could be interpreted, until Natasha finally said “Let’s just _ask_ him”

Bucky had made an affronted sound. “We can’t just _ask_ him”

“Why not?”

“Because what if it’s his kid? How’s that gonna go?”

“Well just ask indirectly, like… ask him vague stuff, his age and what they do”

Everyone had nodded, because that had been a reasonable solution. It _should_ have been a reasonable solution.

Except Steve was so, _so,_ incredibly dense. Every answer he gave was unhelpful, every scrap of information about Charlie was infuriatingly ambiguous.

What did he like? _Going for walks in the park._ _He loves_ _running around on the grass._

How old was he? _Oh, you know. That age when everything’s still new._

Favourite food? _Peanut butter, straight from the jar if possible._

Favourite toy? _A stuffed rabbit that he like_ _s_ _chewing on when he g_ _e_ _t_ _s_ _sleepy._

Did he have any friends? _Just the others_ _we see_ _at the park._ ( _What_ others? Other dogs? Other kids? Steve hadn’t said)

Can we see a picture of him? _I don’t keep pictures_ _o_ _n my phone, sorry._ (What? Who didn’t keep pictures on their phone?)

Social media was also a bust. If Steve had a profile, he had the privacy set tight and wasn’t using his own image, which made finding him in the sea of a hundred other Steve Rogers impossible.

Now it had been two whole weeks of trying to get an answer with no results. What was worse- with all the questions and interest in Charlie, asking if he was a dog or child at this point would only look terrible. They’d collectively dug themselves into a hole.

But oh, now Steve had a physical _picture_ on his desk, and it _had_ to be Charlie.

“Oh my god, did you see that!?” Clint whisper-yelled, eyes lighting up. Bucky could practically feel the hushed excitement spreading through the office as Steve briefly glanced at the picture and smiled with a dopey grin. He quickly hid his smile- poorly- like he was embarrassed to be seen smiling so much from just a picture, and returned to his work hastily.

That _had_ to be a picture of Charlie.

“Go find out what it is” Clint said.

Bucky turned to him, a scandalized look on his face. “ _No,_ I’m not gonna ask about his picture”

“Come on, it’s your turn”

“We don’t take turns”

“Yeah, but you’ve asked him about Charlie the least. We gotta spread it out so it doesn’t look weird”

“He’s right” Natasha pipped in, peaking over his _other_ cubicle wall where she’d been unabashedly eavesdropping. “Can’t have one person ask all the questions or they look creepy”

Bucky huffed. “Who the hell’s keeping track of how many questions are asked? How do you even know I’ve asked the least?”

“I am, and you’re down by one, Buckster” Tony said from the cubicle across from him, leaning back in his chair to look out from the opening.

Bucky hated this floor’s layout sometimes.

“But it doesn’t _have_ to be me” he argued, hoping they’d send someone else to do it.

“Come on, I’ve got fifty riding on dog and I already asked about Charlie in the elevator this morning” Clint whined.

“He asked about Charlie’s vaccinations, you know, like a normal person; and I followed up asking about his teething” Natasha added.

“Did he answer anything helpful at least?”

Natasha smiled uncomfortably widely, and in a mockery of Steve’s voice, said “ _Oh, well Charlie hardly noticed the shots! And his teething phase wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought”,_ then Natasha dropped the façade and waved noncommittally. “Vague as always”

“What about you?” Bucky asked turning to Tony, trying to deflect. “You’ve never even asked him a question _once”_

Tony raised his hands. “Hey, the bookie can’t get involved in the bet”

“There’s literally an entire office of other people” Bucky said, one last attempt to shake them.

“Again: you’ve asked him the least. This is a team effort, now get in there sport” Natasha ordered with mock authority.

“God, you people are monsters. I hate you all” Bucky muttered, standing from his chair.

“That’s the spirit” Tony cheered.

He was under no doubt that the whole floor’s eyes were on him as he made his way to Steve’s desk, but it wasn’t until he got there that he kicked himself because _how did he ask to see the picture?_

In his annoyance at his coworker’s goading, he hadn’t thought far enough ahead, and now Steve was looking away from his screen questioningly with his handsome handsome face pointed right at Bucky and _oh my god I can’t just ask to see the picture quick think of something to say!_

“Wanna get lunch together? Make it a date?” Bucky asked instead.

_Bad! Bad thing to say!_

Bucky was ready to sink into the floor almost instantly. Or maybe he could spontaneously combust where he stood given the rate his face was heating.

“Uh…” Steve said, eyebrows going up at the unexpected proposal.

“Or, it can just be a lunch, we can, uh, friends” Bucky said, spectacularly failing to recover, Steve still looking at him but with a small smile now.

“I mean, we can _be_ friends, you just seem so cool- wow. Wow, I’m gonna to stop talking now” Bucky stammered.

“No, no, it’s fine. I wanna hear how cool I am” Steve laughed, but it was a kind laugh, and he was leaning back and giving Bucky a dazzling smile.

Bucky huffed, rubbing the back of his neck and glad Steve that was at least taking it in good humour.

“Sorry, that’s not how I wanted to say any of that” he said, shifting on his feet.

“It’s fine- not the worst pickup I’ve ever had” Steve laughed. “And I can’t really go out to lunch since I already packed something, but we can eat outside together? At a bench?” he added, a little more hesitant now.

It took Bucky a second for Steve’s words to sink in, and then…

That. Wow.

“I, uh, yeah. Okay” Bucky blinked, dumbfounded at the direction this had gone.

Steve leaned forward, crossing his arms on his desk. “I didn’t think… I’ve seen you around, but, ah, what I mean to say is-” he blew out a breath, “-I didn’t think you’d be interested, but I’m glad. I didn’t really know how to ask” he said..

Bucky blinked again. Oh. _Oh._

Now Bucky was smiling and leaning his hip on Steve’s desk, trying to be less awkward. “Yeah, me neither. As you heard” he said.

They both shared a small laugh at that.

“Well, you know, it worked out. That’s what counts. Very straight-forward too, I really liked the lack of subtlety” Steve teased, eyes crinkling.

“Hey, I can be subtle”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. I had this whole plan to ask about your new picture before I panicked and stuck my foot in my mouth” Bucky said, not quite lying.

“What, this?” Steve asked, turning the frame for Bucky to see. All of a sudden he was aware of the wave of curiosity at his back, and the subsequent crash of disappointment as Steve turned the frame around to reveal-

_Squeeze the Day_

“I know it’s a little… but my mom made it, and she asked me to bring it to work when she heard I don’t have any decorations at my desk” Steve said, a touch of bashfulness in his voice. “It’s a bit of an inside joke, I have this thing with lemonade she likes to tease me about- but I dunno, it’s cute. Brightens my space”

Inside the frame was the crocheted phrase _Squeeze the Day_ in pink lettering, with a lemon on either side. Bucky stared at it for a beat before a single laugh burst from his mouth.

He rubbed a hand over his eyes, wiping away the wetness that had come up. “Oh my god, you had the whole office gossiping over this” he wheezed.

“Yeah, I noticed a lot of looks” Steve said wryly. “You guys aren’t subtle. But since you brought it up, can I ask what’s the big deal?”

“Oh, uh, it’s uh- Charlie” Bucky stammered, and Steve raised a brow. _Oh,_ _fuck me_ , Bucky thought. He had to come up with something quick- again. At least he had enough sense to know telling Steve the truth wouldn’t end well.

“Nobody’s ever seen a picture of him, and, uh-”

_Think! What’s better than Boy or Dog?_

“- we weren’t sure if he was, uh, real”

_O_ _h_ _h,_ putting his foot right back in his mouth then. It was a good run though- he’d nearly gotten a date, too.

Steve stared at him blankly for a long moment.

“… you weren’t sure if Charlie was _real_ ” Steve asked slowly. “Charlie, who I talk about every day”

_Okay, all in now_ , Bucky thought.

“Well, there were, um, no pictures, and, uh, you know how office gossip can get. The whole floor’s wondering about it” he winced, shrinking in on himself with every word.

Steve huffed disbelievingly. “Are you- is _this_ why everyone’s so interested in Charlie?”

Bucky considered his answer for a second.

“… Yes”

“But you all know about that time he accidentally bit me, I showed you the _bandage”_ Steve said incredulously, pointing at the healed spot on his arm to emphasize. “What, you all thought I was just wearing that for show?”

Bucky cringed internally. “… we didn’t see the bite?” he tried.

“Wow, okay” Steve laughed, more amazed than upset. “Yeah, okay, that’s… _ha!_ ” Steve laughed again, covering his mouth with his hand.

“Sorry, that’s probably not great to hear” Bucky mumbled, suddenly feeling shame for the game they played behind his back.

“What? Oh, don’t worry about it. This is just. Of course this happens” Steve laughed. “My last job, people thought he was my _husband_. Can you imagine? So I thought- I thought if I shared more about him, people wouldn’t make that mistake, but this is- _hoo-_ this one’s really taking the cake”

Steve laughed again, and Bucky shifted awkwardly.

“So, uh… do you still wanna do lunch?” he asked after Steve’s laughter died down a little, trying to shift the topic away from this blunder.

“Absolutely” Steve smiled, wiping a tear from his eye as he recovered.

“Okay. That’s good, that’s, yeah” Bucky stammered, feeling unsteady with the conversation.

“So I’ll meet you at the elevators? For lunch?” Steve asked, still chuckling under his breath.

“Yeah, that sounds good, I’ll, uh, see you then” Bucky said, stepping away from his desk with a small wave. Steve gave him one more parting smile, then turned to his screen, still chuckling.

As Bucky walked away in a daze, he heard Steve mutter under his breath. “ _…not sure if he’s real, ha!_ _O_ _f all the things…_ ”

Bucky got back to his desk and fell into his chair, mind caught in a loop of what they’d discussed. He ignored his coworkers persistent questions, still caught on two things.

_I’m going on a date with Steve._

_I still don’t know if Charlie is his son or dog._

**Author's Note:**

> For those wondering if Charlie is Steve's son or dog, the answer is... whatever is in your heart ;)
> 
> **Title** : Son or Dog?  
>  **Creator(s)** : SucculentHyena  
>  **Card number** : 017  
>  **Link** : https://archiveofourown.org/works/26222863  
>  **Square filled** : G2, Single Parent AU  
>  **Rating** : General  
>  **Archive warnings** : No Archive Warnings Apply  
>  **Major tags** : Modern AU, Humor, Mystery  
>  **Summary** : Nobody can stop talking about Steve Rogers, the newest employee in the office. He’s nice, he’s handsome, and he adores Charlie.  
> There’s only one thing they can’t figure out: is Charlie his son? Or his dog?  
> Bucky’s going to try his best to find out.  
>  **Word count** : 2,500


End file.
